Madness ensued..

March Mindfulness continued…

Life is a little crazy right now. Things are up in the air. Looming over my head. I don’t know how or where life will take us in the coming months. (I know, it sounds so doom and gloom over here…) Seriously, when I was thinking of doing the mindfulness-thing for the month of March, I did not envision how useful it would be. Things happen for a reason!

IMG_1178I have anxiety. And when the shit hits the fan, seriously, it hits it HARD. (pardon my French!) I have found ways to deal with it, but sometimes when the attack comes, it’s hard to stop it. It’s almost like, if I don’t have that panic attack that’s about to follow, then I won’t feel better. This is something that I definitely developed later in my adult-hood, although getting ‘stressed out’ is something I’ve probably always had. Sometimes I would feed off of it, it was my fuel to push myself harder, work harder, do better, etc. Then, you reach a point where you just burn out. Then the stress and the anxiety doesn’t become your fuel, it ends up becoming your kryptonite.

I’ve been pretty faithful in my small attempts at being mindful. Some of what Kabat-Zinn recommends asks you to remove yourself from your present. Look around you- almost, pretend that you’re ‘dead’- not so much in a if I were to not exist then life would go on- but more in a way to realize that life is constantly moving, and if you do take a few moments to yourself, the world will not keel over. I do this randomly throughout the day- especially if I have the pleasure of walking across campus for a meeting. Instead of running through my mind of the millions of little things I have to do or starting to worry about something, I focus on my surroundings.

IMG_1162

IMG_1189

What’s even more difficult, is to calm yourself when you feel the stress and anxiety coming on. When you’ve already crossed a threshold, it’s hard to stop. This is something that I have NOT even close to mastered yet. In the beginning, it can be even more stressful when you can’t get yourself to calm down using your new-found techniques. Given all of that, it’s still important to keep trying!

This upcoming week, I’m going to start incorporating a 3-5 minute mini ‘meditation’ to start my day. It’s not so much my expectation to jump right into meditation, but an attempt to start my practice into just learning to focus on my breath and clearing my mind. More to come next week!

OOTD

IMG_1159

I’ve had this skirt for a while- and I’ve been trying to find a way to wear it more casually! Enter floral sweatshirt!! It’s still miserably cold here in Nashville, so might as well continue dressing for this weird winter-almost-spring weather!

Top- Ann Taylor Floral Lantern Sleeve Sweatshirt

Skirt- So this skirt is from Zara, but I can’t find the same green one online anymore! Here’s one in blue  Similar- Zara Pleated Velvet SkirtP

One thought on “Madness ensued..

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.